The Illusion of Time

This is my father when he was two years old - 1918. I marvel at how much time has passed since this captured moment of dog's tongue and lambs' wool, and child's bare feet in the grass.

This is my father at 75 - 1991. I marvel at how this moment mirrors the one above, as though no time at all has passed.

Mr. Johnson and the Snot-Drop

When I was four, my mother allowed me to watch my father and his neighbor, Mr. Johnson, slaughter a pig. I sat down on a stump, transfixed audience of one.

But what caught and held my attention was not the lifeless pig, but a single drop of clear snot jiggling and threatening to disengage from the end of Mr. Johnson's nose.

I willed the drop to hang on. Here was a Grown-Up pre-occupied. But I had never seen Mr. Johnson smile, and he had never spoken to me. Did he know about the snot? Would he reach up and catch it in time? Or had his fierce engagement with the pig left him oblivious to the perilous business at the end of his nose?

I made a decision in what I thought may be the nick of time. 'Mr. Johnson,' I said, 'I think you better wipe your nose.'

Mr. Johnson lifted his forearm and swiped it across his face. Then he contined working without so much as an irritated glance in my direction.

Goodbye

I didn't say goodbye
when they called to say you were sick
because I didn't catch the first flight.
Went to Chapters
bought three books about dying
read all three asfastasI could oneaftertheother.

I didn't say goodbye at
Step 5: Ask if they wish to view the body.
Do you wish to view the body?
It's taken a beating over the years, but
I'll tell you what, it's a good model.
One of the fastest and strongest made.

Yes, as a matter of fact
I would like to see the body.
Put it back the way it was, please.
Oh, and breathe some life into it too,
as we'll be wanting to climb a mountain and talk politics.

Hello

I imagine sometimes that you're still Somewhere.
And when I catch up you'll ruffle my hair and say
Hello! That was a helluva ride, wasn't it?

I imagine sometimes that you're Nowhere.
There is no catching up, and no review.
But even so ... it was a helluva ride, wasn't it?